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Making Peace with the "Dys"of Function

Most people have dealt with a "dys" in their life. Maybe Some of us have dysfunction in our families, workplace or even within our culture. Dysfunction is part of the process to function. Many of us can relate to this process as well. We push and push and try to make dysfunctional people and things "work" the way we feel they should. Does this work though? Sometimes. Usually we find that even after all our hard work and our death grip of control we still find ourselves running around trying to iron out the kinks.

If you listen to people and try to understand what they need, they will connect with you and talk to you ore. If you give off the right amount of sunshine, serenity of water and the grounded power of the earth, the dysfunctional grows to the thriving. What if we approached each other with more curiosity and nourishment. Are they overfed? underfed? Did they have a thriving environment?

We can make peace with dysfunction by accepting it as a message; a reminder of the importance of balance. Dysfunction reminds us to maintain healthy social/cultural and economic environments. We can learn much from dysfunction found in all aspects of life.

So that's nice and la-dee-da but how do I magifest this?

1) When dysfunction arouses you, pay attention: The first thing we can do is pay more attention to the way we react to dysfunction. It can be helpful to keep track of your reactions mentally or write it down so that you can begin to reorganize a pattern.

2) Choose your dysfunctions. Sometimes it's better to let go of dysfunction sometimes we can't fix it. It doesn't mean that it can't be "fixed" over time or by experience.Sometimes the things we think need "fixing" are perfect as they are. Some dysfunction is here to serve some purpose, even if that purpose is to challenge our beliefs. Sometimes, it's up to the great mystery and the path of life to fix that which we cannot. Accepting that not everything needs to be fixed while focusing on what we want to create to balance with that dysfunction may be a more effective strategy depending on our desired outcome.

3) Figure out what about the dysfunction is bothering you? It may also be helpful to write this out. When we write it out we are logically processing the emotions we are feeling and it helps bring clarity to our experience.

4)Instead of trying to fix someone else's dysfunction fix your response to it. We are more powerful setting an example that shaming, ghosting and excluding those we feel are dysfunctional.

5) Keep boundaries and loving kindness: It's important we don't overstep our boundaries with friends, family and loved ones. Sometimes we need to take space or make boundaries with the dysfunctional behaviors of others but that doesn't mean we have to turn off love, compassion or understanding. If anythi8ng we should stay strong in our boundaries but lean into the discomfort because often behind the dysfunction is a need for love safety or acceptance.

So don't sweat the dys!

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